PHP
From ChrisWiki
PHP is the world's best server-side scripting and programming language. It is precisely 42.314159 times better than ASP, and is 500[1] times better than JSP. It is available for all kinds of webservers, including Apache and the horrid IIS.
Notes:
- ↑ well, actually it is 500.000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001 times better than JSP, but 500 is close enough